So it finally happened. The moment that I never thought would come did. I was having a conversation with one of my best friends, let's call her Kate, and I actually heard myself say, "I'm happily single."
For the past six months I have prayed that my relationship with Max would somehow start up again. I constantly wished he would come back in my life, because I felt that I would never be truly happy again without him. Yes, this is a completely irrational thought, but during a breakup those tend to pop in and out of your mind.
When I was talking to Kate about dating and relationships it was one of the first times I felt that I was talking without a guard up. For months when I would talk about this situation with my friends I could tell I was forcing myself to say certain things such as, I don't miss my relationship or, I am happy without him. When I would say those things I was practically forcing them to come out of my mouth. Not this time.
When I told Kate I was happily single it almost fell out of my mouth. I didn't even think about it before I said it. I just heard the words. This made me stop and ask myself, am I actually at the point where I am happy on my own again? Am I really okay without Max?
It turns out that I'm pretty sure the answer to those two questions is yes. This past weekend Kate and I went on a bar crawl in New York City. We had the best time laughing and having fun. The night before, I went out to dinner and shopping with my friend Sarah and had an incredible time. During these events I didn't even think about Max or being single once. It was one of the first times I really felt content on my own. This is a huge step for me.
Now of course I still miss Max and get upset when I think about him and his new girlfriend. But, I am no longer upset about not being with him. I feel like I have hit a point where I am okay without him. I will miss him as my friend forever, and get nostalgic when I think of my time with him. But, I am finally happy with my single girl status, and finally happy without Max.
If you are going through a breakup, know that is does take time, but you can get to this point too. I'm not completely over him, the memories of the realtionship, or the trauma of the breakup, but I have taken a huge step in the process, and you can too.
Until next time!
For the past six months I have prayed that my relationship with Max would somehow start up again. I constantly wished he would come back in my life, because I felt that I would never be truly happy again without him. Yes, this is a completely irrational thought, but during a breakup those tend to pop in and out of your mind.
When I was talking to Kate about dating and relationships it was one of the first times I felt that I was talking without a guard up. For months when I would talk about this situation with my friends I could tell I was forcing myself to say certain things such as, I don't miss my relationship or, I am happy without him. When I would say those things I was practically forcing them to come out of my mouth. Not this time.
When I told Kate I was happily single it almost fell out of my mouth. I didn't even think about it before I said it. I just heard the words. This made me stop and ask myself, am I actually at the point where I am happy on my own again? Am I really okay without Max?
It turns out that I'm pretty sure the answer to those two questions is yes. This past weekend Kate and I went on a bar crawl in New York City. We had the best time laughing and having fun. The night before, I went out to dinner and shopping with my friend Sarah and had an incredible time. During these events I didn't even think about Max or being single once. It was one of the first times I really felt content on my own. This is a huge step for me.
Now of course I still miss Max and get upset when I think about him and his new girlfriend. But, I am no longer upset about not being with him. I feel like I have hit a point where I am okay without him. I will miss him as my friend forever, and get nostalgic when I think of my time with him. But, I am finally happy with my single girl status, and finally happy without Max.
If you are going through a breakup, know that is does take time, but you can get to this point too. I'm not completely over him, the memories of the realtionship, or the trauma of the breakup, but I have taken a huge step in the process, and you can too.
Until next time!